ok, just a teeny weeny short post please?

monday vs srjc postponed, tues vs srjc 37-10 (US!), wed vs tpjc postponed, fri morn vs tpjc.

so im missing sch 4 days in a row! i can imagine the mugging i have to do after season.. more honey lattes, cappucinos and library visits. cool. just have to find mugging kaki. please God? hehee. hope can find cycling/running kakis during our after-season break too. but for now, i shall just think abt season!!

erm yea, sch life is interesting(?!). i think i'll finally stop looking ard when eye-candies pass by. its either one or NONE! help me carmen. haaaaa.

but more or less sch is just abt netball. wake up think netball, go to sleep think netball. eating think netball. bathing also think netball!? when im praying its still abt netball. not praying for netball, but about the whole thing.. my attitude, my motives for playing it.. hahaha. im going NUTS. thank God im not the only one. stacy is too!! haha.

yah. currently, stil think that i won't have close friends in vjc to share my life with. i sincerely hope that will change, that in this short 1year+ there'll really be people who really matter to my heart..

was reading inspirational quotes.. haha. concentration is the ability to think of absolutely nothing when absolutely necessary.

i really dont wanna think of YOU! sigh.

haha time flies.. so long nvr blog le.. anw this place is so dead so doesnt really matter.. nobody tags!!!! so u better tag if u read this can?! haha.

okay.. what has been happening arh? easter weekend at tioman.. was really fun tho we didnt get to play ball cos of rain. but it was a good time of refreshing and recharging and realignment to God.. went snorkeling, gosh so FUN! spent time with ppl like viona, chris, sarah, and got to know them better =) not forgetting my godpa! haha, like so long nvr talk to him lidat. and bunked in with grandma jean so got to spent more time with her too!! yayness. felt in such a loving and family kinda environment. hee.

erm other then that.. mostly life's about netball.. cant really include studies cos im not really like into it now. netball really rox my life can. so fun. i dunno why i just love the game so much. like some kinda fanatic. i want to overcome all the weaknesses.. mental and physical.. to build my stamina so i can play 4 quarters and hardly panting like what rachel of HCI did. haha.

i think the game is beautiful.

anyway, yesterday it was raining like crazy when i reachd the bus stop, n i cldnt go home so i went to airport to finish up my essay and do my work. realised how much i missed spending time on my own. when i was just walking around after doing my work and stuff.. yea it felt good. strangely i felt soothed. haha. don't need worry abt the things to say.. about fitting into schedules.. about finishing up on time.. haha. the freedom. perhaps im just selfish.. wanna just do things my way in my own time. dunno la. haha.

and then today was the our 1st match as VJC A div 06. hahah growing to love the team more. i liked the hanging out part before we met up and went to kallang!! anyway, though we got trashed 64-19 i still think we fought quite hard. like wad ms seow said.. gt some v gd players, some v bad players so we averaged out. hmm. i don't want to be the one to pull down the average or sth. yeh. i WILL play hard when its my turn. monday will b against srjc. really hope i'll get a chance to play again. every game is an opportunity to grow and learn!! pray hard pray hard. please God! haha.

hai i still got so much to learn as a person. still so immature really. i need to be disciplined. to be wise and watch my mouth. to forgive and love people, good and horrible, unconditionally. love God and seek Him above all. and live out the fact that "whats most impt is what God thinks is best for us.. doesnt matter what we think". be patient.. and wait. and let myself be willing to "undergo construction" from God. increase my faith God! i wanna believe.

You are...
my shield
my strength
my portion
deliverer
my shelter
strong tower
my very present help
in times of need

friday against NJC.

full game. learnt a lot of stuff. 34-36. i mispassed thrice in the 1st quarter. and a few more times in the whole game. no confidence to do long pass except last quarter when jac n glan was ard. not fit enough cos if i was super fit i could have ran faster and be half a second ahead of WA, nt nxt to her, and gotten closer to that 10 interceptions!! sorry to those who really wanted to hear fana's secret including myself. oops. guilty. haha.

seriously i hope i'll get fitter by start of season. and improve on my passes. regain my confidence. hug the D and protect MY space for throw-in. go for the 2ndpass lob-balls towards the D. even tho thats like FAST! i wana GET THAT BALL! roar.

surprising how a game can make me stronger. really felt like crying at one pt in time in the game.. cos i just felt so dunno what to do. so not confident to throw/run. so many turnovers we didn't bring down, and it was so the defenders' fault. felt like i let down the team because every member's pass and run matters.

this friendly was so useful cos i really learnt a lot a lot. all my weaknesses were exposed!! especially what goes on in my head. guilty, ashamed, irritated at my own weaknesses. but yet refueled cos i hv new stuff to work on. i must overcome the stupid "demons of the past". and be a strong player.

i really want to overcome. the 2 years i wasted at AHnetball blind to these things. i shall not push the blame to anyone except myself. no more mediocrity. only excellence. help me Lord, no mediocrity anymore. out of my comfort zone. let me change into the person u want me to be.. i know you can even use a sport to mould me. let me not lose steam!

God is good, He's so wise, He can use all circumstances to mean good for us. haha. praise God! =)

hope everybody felt that it was a gd learning experience too. VJ netball all the way! let's train hard every opportunity we have! (:

pamper me please? ;D

O by Damien Rice. (CD)
Now, Discover Your Strengths by Marcus Buckingham. (book)
MP3 player. any. ipod, creative, i just need a player! haha.
New handphone.
Decent wallet, not purse anymore..
High socks for training!
Trip to Queensway+ shoes.

ok, i NEED socks (desperately) and shoes. the rest are wants. haa. but still.. pleasee? heh. smiles.

tdy vj soccer won MI 2-1. great job guys! haha. they persevered to the end and kept attacking. yeah! =)

tmr 6pm vs NJC. help me God. to PUSH myself. find my limits and go beyond. its in the mind. for the team.. VJNB all the way! =)

anw, tdy had triple jump, came in fourth! haa! 5pts for aquila yay im useful finally. went to parkway macs to meet chinghui to learn how to evangelise. heh qt fruitful lehh. =) "God created us to be relational people.. the void in our hearts are supposed to be filled by Him". had class lunch too! tho i didnt really manage to hang out with them. sorry!

am currently crapping with carmen on msn abt guys. ohmygosh. so rolling-on-floor-giggly and funny can? haha. can't believe i'm doing this.. like what carmen says.. machiam like young teenage girl like that. *giggle. oh well, for fun only la. i tink the times of seriously liking a guy is over for now. don't think any guy will come along for me to really fall for. haa! thats the way things go.

back to giggling!

i sprained my ankle on friday. =( how stupid. missed the friendly against seniors, but we played quite well. vjnb all the way =)

geri's pulling out of hse comm. aghh.. giving me 2nd thoughts too. why stick ard and persevere for sth tht doesn't mean that much to you.. better nt say too much..

i foresee that i'll be just an averager in vjc. unless i find my true passion. but i can make a difference for God's kingdom here. really. leave a mark tt will last for eternity.

samantha said to just "put studies on hold right now." its season, c'mon. once in a lifetime, a div 06. ok. i'll give my all for netball now. concentrate on resting my ankle and sleep a lot a lot and try to eat less. yes. i shall stop worrying abt my dumb lects/tutorials. i'll just hv to play catchup for 1mth's worth of work, not too bad. i shall stop worrying abt hse comm. i'll do my best, but thats that. yeh.

eat sleep watch play dream think netball.

VJ netball. we can do it! =)